top of page
Writer's picturePamelagrace

The Harmonious Journey: How Learning to Sing Mirrors Success in Daily Life


Singing is often seen as an art form reserved for the stage, but the journey of learning to sing holds valuable lessons that extend far beyond musical notes. The process of developing vocal skills parallels many aspects of achieving success in everyday life. Here’s how the learning process for singing can teach us about resilience, discipline, and the power of community.



1.First the Dream

If you can see something in your mind and believe it is possible, well, then…it is. Someone once told me that the reason people don’t achieve their dreams is mostly that they give up on them. I have often said, “Dreams have no expiration date.” So, if we have a dream, and we really see it in our mind, there’s a strong possibility it will come to be. 


Those who study human behavior even agree with this. They explain it as "thought leads to action, leads to desired outcome.  They have a fancy scientific word for the “phenomenon” but it makes sense.  Once we get an idea in out head and we feed it with our thought energy, we ourselves, find ways to make it so.  For example, let’s say you decide you want a red sports car. Suddenly everywhere you look you will see red sports cars and sports car dealerships when previously you hadn’t.  That is because they weren’t on your radar at the time. If you change your mind and decide you want a gray Honda, then that’s what you will see. What’s important is to recognize this phenomena and realize that we can do this.

 

I decided out of the blue that I wanted to sing jazz.  I didn’t want to sing country western or rock and roll or the infamous (to me) “Americana” whatever the that is.  I wanted to sing jazz. I had never sung it before.  I mentioned in my bio that I didn’t know the definition of jazz standards.  But when my vocal coach had me sing those standards, I was in love and all I wanted to do was sing jazz.  This is where it gets important.  I really wanted to do this.  It wasn’t a sort of, or maybe when I have more time and/or skill kind of thing. My heart was in it. This kept me working at singing and that kind of drive helped create my success.




2. Setting Goals and Practicing Discipline

On the practical side, just like learning to sing involves having a dream we want to make real, how we do that is important.  Setting specific vocal goals—whether it’s mastering a difficult song or improving vocal range are solid steps along the way. Success in daily life requires similar goal-setting and discipline. When aspiring singers first start, they may struggle with hitting high notes or maintaining breath control. These challenges necessitate regular practice and patience.


In daily life, whether you’re aiming for a promotion, pursuing a fitness goal, or learning a new skill, the same principles apply. Establishing clear goals and committing to daily practice can lead to steady improvement and success. The key is consistency: just as a singer must practice scales and techniques and singing with an accompanist, we must put in the effort to refine our skills and overcome obstacles. 



3. Embracing Vulnerability and Overcoming Fear

Singing can be a deeply personal and vulnerable experience. Many people fear singing in public due to concerns about judgment or criticism. However, facing these fears is part of the learning process. Singers often perform in front of others, which helps them build confidence and resilience.


My first public appearance was a disaster.  My vocal coach insisted I go to a jam and sing with the house band. The band was very good and there were singers there who knew what they were doing. I was not one of them. I had no idea how to work with a band.  The band leader played an introduction for my song and I couldn’t find my key note.  It was all downhill from there.  Fortunately one of the experienced singers comforted me by telling to keep trying, not to give up.


In life, we face various situations that require us to step out of our comfort zones, whether it’s giving a presentation, applying for a new job, or engaging in difficult conversations. Embracing vulnerability can lead to growth and new opportunities. Just as singers learn to navigate their fears, we too can cultivate courage and resilience in the face of life’s challenges.

Early on I discovered I would have to be vulnerable.  I would make mistakes and it was what it was.  I disliked telling the audience I was new to singing but I didn’t present myself as overly experienced.  When people asked me how long I’d been singing, I told them the truth.  They thought I was not being honest. It was a compliment to have people think I knew more than I did.  But what they picked up on was my previous stage background and the fact that my heart was in my songs.



4. The Power of Feedback and Continuous Improvement

Feedback is crucial in singing. Whether it comes from a vocal coach, peers, or even recordings of oneself. Constructive criticism helps singers refine their techniques and improve their performance. This cycle of receiving feedback and making adjustments is fundamental to mastering any skill. Asking for feedback takes vulnerability as well as strength. After my first disaster at a jam, I asked my guitar accompanist to come hear me sing. I told him what had happened the first time.  He gave me essential advice on how to work the band and find my note.  He continued to give me advice on how to perform on stage and helped build my confidence and ability to sing to an audience.


In daily life, seeking feedback from colleagues, mentors, or friends can provide insights that help us grow. We have to avoid letting our feelings get hurt by negative reactions. Embracing a mindset of continuous improvement—where we see feedback as a tool for development rather than a source of discouragement—can propel us toward our goals. Just as a singer learns from each performance, we too can learn from our experiences and strive to better ourselves.



5. Building a Supportive Community

Many singers find strength in community, whether through singing groups, choirs, or online forums. This camaraderie fosters a sense of belonging and provides encouragement during the learning process. Supportive environments are essential for growth, as they allow individuals to share experiences, celebrate successes, and motivate each other.

In life, building a network of support is equally important. Surrounding ourselves with positive influences—friends, family, or professional contacts—can help us stay motivated and navigate challenges more effectively. Just as a choir harmonizes to create beautiful music, we too can collaborate with others to achieve our goals and enhance our journeys.


6. Cultivating Patience and Celebrating Progress

Learning to sing is not an overnight achievement. It requires time, patience, and the willingness to celebrate small victories along the way. Whether it’s nailing a challenging piece or simply feeling more comfortable with one’s voice, recognizing progress is essential for maintaining motivation.


At first the only time I sang in front of an audience was at the open mic jams. I was on a steep learning curve. I learned to give myself credit for the progress I made, like finding my key (!), or remembering all the lyrics, or staying in tune or not losing my place when someone walking through the door on my left or behind me.



Similarly, success in life is often a marathon, not a sprint. Acknowledging small achievements—like completing a project, improving a skill, or making a positive change—can boost our morale and keep us focused on the bigger picture. The journey is just as important as the destination, and every step forward deserves recognition.

The journey of learning to sing is rich with lessons that resonate deeply in our daily lives. By embracing our dreams, goal-setting to achieve them, overcoming fear, seeking feedback, fostering community, and celebrating progress, we can navigate life’s challenges with the same dedication and passion that singers bring to their craft. So, whether you’re belting out a tune in the shower or simply striving for personal growth, remember that the principles of singing can guide you toward success in all areas of life. Let your voice be heard, and your journey unfold in harmony!

8 views0 comments
Writer's picturePamelagrace

Updated: Mar 10, 2020


It was a warm summer day. Folks were gathering outside to enjoy the sun. The church service had ended and I was at my favorite spot selling cake and bagels to hungry congregants. I love feeding people. Finally the end of my volunteer shift came. All the cake had been gobbled up and all but one of the bagels. This last bagel was huge. It was also a trick bagel. Bagel purists would look at it with a squinchy eye. "What are the brown specks in the bagel?" they would ask. Some thought ma"Maybe the specks were blue berries. "Were they?" Some thought they might be raisons. I would solumny shake my head and then lower the boom. The brown specks were chocolate chips. Now some of you might say "Oh chocolate chips. O.K." But not bagel purists! Nobody who truly appreciates bagels would EVER eat one with chocolate chips. I can't explain exactly but you just do't do that to a bagel. So the huge bagel sat there all alone on the plate. Warming in the sun, until...


As I gazed at the dwindling crowd and thought it was time to pack up, I noticed a pair of big brown eyes peeping over the ledge of the table. They were staring at the chocolate chip bagel. Then, before I could do anything but smile, a little brown hand snaked over the table to the plate where the bagel sat, and snatched the bagel off the plate! The little fellow then grabbed the bagel with both hands, it was almost as big as his little face and sniffed it. At that point, all thoughts of retrieving the bagel fled from my mind. To further cement my decision not to interfere, he then took a big bit out of it. The bagel was his.

Then a woman with a look of horror came running toward him. His mother I presumed. I quickly assured her he could have the bagel, for free. He'd already taken three bites out of by then.


I thought about the little guy a lot as time went on. I admired his determination, his commitment to grabbing what he wanted. He didn't ask permission. He didn't hesitate or second guess himself. He didn't do all the things grown-ups do that keep us from achieving or getting what we want in life. He was single minded, clear and gutsy. I thought about the times I hesitated, questioned myself, doubted myself. I wondered what would happen if I just reaching out and grabbed it, whatever "it" was? What if I stopped second guessing myself or doubting myself or questioning my abilities, my gifts, my dreams and just WENT for it? Granted I wouldn't get everything I wanted but I'm guaranteed not to get it if I let self doubt and fear overcome me. That little boy had nerve! He grabbed that bagel and enjoyed it immensely. He was munching on it all the way down the street as his mother towed him to the car to go home. If he can do it why can't we who are so much smarter (?), bigger and more equipped? Why not?

9 views0 comments
Writer's picturePamelagrace

Updated: Mar 10, 2020

Why would a singer talk about painting, unless she is also a painter. Painting and singing jazz have one big thing in common. They are both creative efforts. Another thing they have in common is that skill is involved. Yet, without passion, skill is enjoyable but lacks a certain essence that only the heart can bring.



Several years ago I saw the Picasso exhibit at Seattle Art Museum. The one painting used to advertise the showing was marvelous. It was rich, abstract, striking, energetic and colorful. It was unique among the paintings being shown for reasons I couldn't quite identify until I left the gallery. Then it came to me, I could literally feel Picasso thinking as he designed and painted the abstracts in the gallery. He was well known, as you may know, for his cubistic approach to form, especially the human figure. However, the painting of the woman used in advertising the show, although abstracted, still had a separate energy that caught my attention. Picasso had had many mistresses, probably all of whom he had painted. This mistress, however, was said to be one who had her own mind and Picasso couldn't control her. So rather than feel his thinking as he abstracted her form, I imagine what I felt was his emotions about her. Those emotions made the painting far more compelling to me than the more thoughtful ones. That is a long way around making the point that skill is important but to be most impactful, a creative endeavor also needs passion!

12 views0 comments
bottom of page